


Death Of A Loved One

by Warp5Complex_Archivist



Category: Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-06-16
Updated: 2006-06-15
Packaged: 2018-08-15 22:01:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8074255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warp5Complex_Archivist/pseuds/Warp5Complex_Archivist
Summary: I last saw him enter the pod. That was the last I saw of him. He looked at me and he must have seen my worry for him, going on that mission to find the Xindi bastards who killed overseven million lives, souls that were once living breathing human beings.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Kylie Lee, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Warp 5 Complex](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Warp_5_Complex), the software of which ceased to be maintained and created a security hazard. To make future maintenance and archive growth easier, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but I may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Warp 5 Complex collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/Warp5Complex).

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I last saw him enter the pod. That was the last I saw of him. He looked at me and he must have seen my worry for him, going on that mission to find the Xindi bastards who killed overseven million lives, souls that were once living breathing human beings.   
â€œDonâ€™t worry Jess. We wonâ€™t be long.â€

â€œWatch your backs and I mean itâ€

That was also the last I spoke to him. Those eyes, deep with the colour of Emerald Tree Boas I came to love so much.

He climbed into the pod, along with Lieutenant Reed, Commander Tucker and Captain Archer. Several MACOâ€™s were already inside the pod waiting for the four men to enter the pod and get started with the important mission. Major Hayes was with them.

Hayes. Heâ€™s a guy I couldnâ€™t care less about. His sarcastic remarks that he makes sure the senior staff doesnâ€™t hear of. No wonder Lieutenant Reed can't stand him.He jokes about how I came to love a man from an organisation I hate so much. I donâ€™t hate it; I just came to live with it. Itâ€™s life. And life has to be lived

He was gone for me at that point. Gone. And there was nothing I could do but scream and to shout when I came to hear of the news that would be coming a day and a half later.

After the pod had its hatch closed we left the launch bay. Sub Commander Tâ€™Pol was silent as we walked into the control room to de-compressurize the room we had just left. I understood why he had to go. Some of his family was killed in the Xindi attack on Earth. Like his Aunt Cheryl. She was living in Florida at the time. He shared Commander Tuckerâ€™s hate of the Xindi but his dreams were lesser than that of Commander Tuckerâ€™s.

I knew why Commander Tucker was visiting Sub Commander Tâ€™Polâ€™s quarters every few nights. I had read up on Vulcan rituals and the language was both interesting and complicated.

I couldnâ€™t understand why the Xindi would want to do that just because we were apparently going to exterminate their race in the near future. All they had to do was to alert Starfleet Command of what they would possiblybe doing in the futureand ask Starfleet Command not to do it.

The pod left the bay. I closed my eyes and prayed he would come back.

â€œThey will return Ensign.â€

â€œYes Maâ€™am. Dead or alive is another matterâ€

Sub Commander Tâ€™Pol had nodded to show she understood what I meant. She was one of the few who knew of my relationship with the MACO I loved. She had caught us kissing in the Observation Room, we explained and she kept it confidential. But it did make Sub Commander Tâ€™Pol and me good friends.

We went back to the bridge and watched the little pod move off towards the planet. I knew he may not return and I accepted that but I knew I wouldnâ€™t be able to live with it.

I didnâ€™t say goodbye. Not yet. I couldnâ€™t do that. After the pod disappeared I left the bridge and went back to work in Engineering. Lieutenant Hess was busy as usual so we didnâ€™t chat much. Hess and I were good friends and often talked. But today was different. We didnâ€™t talk. We kept on being busy, to occupy ourselves and to stop thinking about what my lover was doing on the planet below us. I donâ€™t think the Xindi knew they were coming and I prayed they wouldnâ€™t know they were there.

Heâ€™s left.


	2. Chapter 2

The day passed with worry and anxiety. I didnâ€™t sleep the night before, the day he left me.

I forced myself to remember him before the Xindiâ€™s attack on Earth. He was lighter then. He was without a care in the world and he showed me his love more than he showed his Cocker Spaniel. His shoulders werenâ€™t dragged with hate and the want of revenge. His face not gaunt and scarred. His eyes were full of laughter and hope. Now theyâ€™re empty and cold, full of hate and anger.

He puts up a front but I know what he is feeling. To me his barriers can be breached without trouble. I donâ€™t work on words.

He shunts what love I give him away. He wonâ€™t accept it anymore. He is so obsessed with the finding of this weapon and killing as many Xindi as he can.

Although, we did manage to have a nice talk two months back.

Two months back

â€œWhy do you put up barriers to which I donâ€™t have to work through?â€

â€œThey killed overseven million lives including my own family Jess. Iâ€™m not just going to sit here and do nothing. I love you Jess but this is important to me and the survival of Earth. Donâ€™t you see or are you blind to the facts?â€

â€œYes but surely not all Xindi are to blame. I heard that there arefive different specie of Xindi. Maybe only a few of the parties are to blame. Not all. Darren, in some ways they are like us. They have feelings and emotions just like we doâ€¦â€

â€œNo, they donâ€™t. They gave no remorse or made no show of it. Isnâ€™t remorse an emotion Jess? Isnâ€™t it?â€

â€œGo to basics Darren. Theyâ€™re like us whether you like it or not. They breathe, they reproduce, they move, speak and anything else we do. They may have some extra things that we donâ€™t Darren, but they are just like us. I donâ€™t like them for what they did any better than you do but I accepted that it was not the whole Xindi races that are to blame except for the select fewâ€

â€œI donâ€™t care. They are going to pay for what they did.â€

â€œOur love will die if you continueâ€ I was close to crying.

â€œI do love you. More than anything. But love can wait, this canâ€™tâ€ He stood and went to the door

â€œIt canâ€™t wait if youâ€™re dead Darrenâ€ He just looked at me and left. Overcome with the last proper conversation had turned out I burst into floods of tears. No one came to soothe me, he didnâ€™t return to say he was sorry and wouldnâ€™t do what he would do.

Back to the Present

His face had haunted me that night and it sometimes still does. It had returned last night so I had gone to the Mess to get some refreshing water. I found the water that the DPU unit in the mess made was more refreshing than of the highland springs in Scotland.

I was about to leave when I had been interrupted by none other than Doctor Phlox. He and I had also become good friends. I found his optimistic character highly amusing, as I was sure he found me so.

I told him of who was going and he gave me counsel but no words can console me at that time but I heeded his words and appreciated his company.

Now I did learn that Darren wanted to go the path he had earlier chosen and I had to accept that.

Heâ€™s forgotten me.


	3. Chapter 3

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This was it. The day they are meant to return to the safety of Enterprise. I was allowed to come onto the bridge to wait for him and the rest of his party to return. I sat behind the Engineering station next to Tactical.   
It was the first time I had sat in this chair. If it had been in better circumstances I probably would have felt ecstatic but as it was, I wasnâ€™t feeling that. I was hoping he would return safely. That Major Hayes had done his best to protect him.

They did come back and had hailed us. It was Major Hayes and it was only on audio. It didnâ€™t look good especially when they were five hours late.

We met them in the launch bay after the temporary replacement on Tactical had pulled them back inside.

Tâ€™Pol made sure Dr. Phlox was down awaiting the arrival and I followed her down. The walk was silent. The two of us didnâ€™t dare to speak. It was if an omen was bearing down upon us. We entered the launch bay control room to find Phlox already on standby, waiting. We stood in silence as we waited for the room to compressurize.

The room finally finished compressurising and we stepped inside the room. The pod looked very battered and looked like it was on its last legs. Its hatch opened and Hayes limbered out. He looked at us gravely and turned back to the open space. He reached inside and with the help from another man who was inside the pod he lifted out the body of the Captain.

I couldnâ€™t tell if he was dead or not but he looked it. Phlox was at his side at once, once Hayes had laid him on the floor and returned to the pod. It was not looking good.

Tâ€™Pol moved towards the Doctor and I went to Hayes to offer my services. He accepted and we carried the body of the normally cheerful engineer. His face had three cuts along the cheek. Bleeding slightly. We lifted him between us and moved him to the right of the body of our beloved Captain.

The next to come was our Tactical officer which came to much surprise to me but his wounds seemed to appear less apparent. I knew he was alive, I could vaguely hear him breathing. We laid him to the left of Archer.

We lifted about three to four of the MACOâ€™s out before Hayes turned to me and said:

â€œItâ€™s best if you stopped helping me now Jess.â€

When he mentioned my name, I knew what was about to be told or shown to me was not going to be good. I was beginning to know who was the next poor soul.

â€œHeâ€™sâ€¦well. Youâ€™ll be very emotionalâ€

â€œIâ€™ll liveâ€ I told him firmly, my eyelids betraying my true feelings.

â€œStill, I think itâ€™s best Jess.â€

I nodded and just stood where I was. I saw Hayes move over to the hatch and lifted a body out with the help of another MACO.

At first I didnâ€™t recognise the body but as they laid him on the floor near the pod I recognised the hair. His hair was whitely blonde with thin, black streaks in it. The reason he gained the nickname â€˜Streakerâ€™. I was by his side at once and I wiped the black soil from his face. I was crying silent hot tears.

â€œIâ€™m sorry Jess. We did all we could for him. He was a good man and he loved youâ€

â€œI know Majorâ€ I said, blinking to hold back the tears

Hayes rested his hand on my shoulder and for the first time in my life I didnâ€™t mind him touching me. I couldnâ€™t hold my tears any longer. I cried and lay on the cold body that was Darren.

I was mumbling and I couldnâ€™t hear much of what was happening around me. I caught that Archer and Tucker were still alive but were in danger of dying. They were carted off to sickbay immediately. They kept going back and forth to sickbay carting MACOâ€™s and remaining officers.

Thirtyseconds later Phlox came over to me. His voice was gentle.

â€œEnsign? We need to take him to sickbay nowâ€

I looked at him forlorn and nodded slowly. I was still overcome with tears and two other crewmembers that I didnâ€™t know carried him out. Phlox and me followed close behind. We entered sickbay and they placed him on a trolley bed. They covered him with a sheet. A white sheet. I wouldnâ€™t let them cover his head. I wanted to do that.

â€œIâ€™ll miss you love.â€

I kissed him on the forehead and covered his ashen face with the white cloth. A medical officer offered me a chair knowing I wouldnâ€™t want to leave. I thanked her and took the chair.

The sickbay remained busy for the rest of the day. Phlox was busy trying to get Commander Tucker and Captain Archer stable. He didnâ€™t have to do much work with Lieutenant Reed, as he didnâ€™t suffer the same amount of injury. He was also the first to wake. Phlox had asked me, seeming I was relieved of duty for a couple of days if I could just keep an eye on him.

So I was there for when Lieutenant Reed would wake. He woke shortly before three if I remembered correctly and I was the first friendly face heâ€™d seen for a day.

He groaned and I moved towards his bed. I had brought the chair along with me.

â€œLieutenant?

When he answered I could barely hear him. His voice was so shallow. I made out an â€˜uhâ€™.

â€œYou there? You need to open your eyes.â€

His eyelids flickered and slowly but surely opened. He blinked a few times to get adjusted to the white light.

â€œWhere am I?â€ He said, barely audible.

â€œYouâ€™re safe in Sickbay Sir.â€

His eyes closed in relief but soon re-opened them with worry again.

â€œAnd the others?â€

â€œDr. Phlox has been trying to get Captain Archer and Commander Tucker stable for the time theyâ€™ve been here so far. The MACOâ€™s I donâ€™t know about Sirâ€

The Lieutenant nodded.

â€œMajor Hayes explained that you andâ€¦â€

â€œDarren Sirâ€ I answered for him surprised that Hayes would tell him.

â€œYou and Darren were an item. He was a good man even if he was a MACO.â€

I smiled a little bit but nodded slightly in thanks for the good willed comment.

â€œThank you. The Major said the same thingâ€

â€œHe did his best.â€

â€œI know he didâ€

Lieutenant Reed was very understanding towards my loss. His eyes were full of worry for his superiors and sympathy for my recent loss. I wanted to forget it all. Forget it ever happened and I wanted to go back and stop it all and I wanted to believe it wasnâ€™t real. But the fact was it was happening proved it was very real indeed.

I looked at Lieutenant Reed again but he was asleep. He had moved his right hand onto his chest, which was going up and down at a steady rate,

I left him to it. I stood and went to Phlox to find out how Archer and Tucker was doing. I was very concerned for the both of them, considering Tucker was my commanding officer in my job and Archer was my Captain. Plus I wanted to give Lieutenant Reed better news when he next woke.

I found Phlox in his office going over things. He sensed I was there.

â€œCome on in. I could do with the company. Has Lieutenant Reed woken yet?â€ He asked, looking at me asI came in.

â€œYes, he has but he returned to sleep after five minutes being awake. How are Captain Archer and Commander Tucker?â€

â€œThey are stable and their injuries, well, most of them are healed. I predict they will wake in the next day or two. Youâ€™re welcome to stayâ€ He said.

â€œThanksâ€

I sat in a chair next to the Denobulan. I picked at my nails and looked in front of me. The panel giving no apparent warmth.

â€œHow long were you two in love?â€

â€œBefore I joined Starfleet and he joined the MACOâ€™s. We grew up in high school together. We had a bond straight away and we both knew it but we waited till we were a suitable age that both our parents would accept. I was assigned to Enterprise so we were separated for a short while but then of course the Xindi attack happened he had joined the MACOâ€™s so he got transferred onto Enterprise with his unit. He and Hayes were the best of friends.â€™ I smiled of good memories â€˜he said that if we were going to marry he wanted Hayes to be the best man.â€

â€œI take it you donâ€™t like Hayes very much,â€ it came out more of a statememnt then a question

â€œI used to hate him but now Iâ€™m not so sure. When he touched my shoulder in the launch bay I didnâ€™t mind him doing so. In fact, I was grateful for it. I donâ€™t know how heâ€™s feeling about thisâ€

â€œPerhaps itâ€™s best you talk to himâ€

â€œI donâ€™t know. I just donâ€™t want to talk about his death right now,â€ I muttered.

â€œIf you put it off now it will only get you laterâ€

â€œI know. Your counsel is very much appreciated Doctor,â€ I thanked him.

Phlox just smiled and returned to his work. His fingers darting across the panels.

I relaxed and sank back into the chair comfortable in my surroundings. I eventually fell asleep.

When I woke the next morning I found myself on a biobed. I sat up and ran a hand through my hair. My hair was black with a white streak at the front at either side.

â€œHeyâ€

A British voice rose from the bed next to mine. Lieutenant Reed was looking at me. I looked at him from the reaction to the noise of his voice and smiled.

â€œHey. How are you doing Sir?â€

â€œFine as to be expected. Yourself?â€ he aasked, looking at me.

I knew the Lieutenant could be very polite

â€œIâ€™m not sure exactly. Iâ€™ve got too many emotions swimming inside me," I told him, looking at my feet.

â€œOh? And what emotions would they be?â€ He asked, his brow furrowed.

â€œSadness, Anger, the want of revenge for Darrenâ€™s death and the others I canâ€™t identifyâ€

â€œQuite a lot thenâ€

I laughed a little. I realised after a while Lieutenant Reed had put his hand in mine. I hadnâ€™t realised I was so close to him.

â€œEverything will turn out fine in the endâ€

â€œI hope so Sir.â€

The Lieutenant released my hand and laid his hand back on his chest. I pulled up a chair and sat beside him.

â€œSo how many days have you got left till you start work again?â€

â€œThe Sub Commander said I could have the rest of the week off. I was grateful but I might start a little early. To get my mind off things.â€

â€œHmm.â€

â€œWhat happened down there, Sir?â€

â€œYou donâ€™t want to know and I donâ€™t want to talk about it,â€ He said it firmly. Whatever happened down there evidently was so atrocious that no one would want to speak about it. Even the Major looked as if he didn't want to speak about what happened.

â€œAll rightâ€

We remained in silence for some time until I heard distinct moaning from the other side of the room. I looked at Reed and stood. He seemed to understand. I crossed the room, listening intently. The groan sounded again and I realised it was our Captain. I went to his side.

â€œCaptain?â€

â€œUhâ€¦Whoâ€¦where," he started, his eyes remained closed but his hands rose sharply. I had to put his hands back on the bio bed so he wouldn't lose circulation.

â€œYouâ€™re in Sickbay Sir,â€ I told him.

He slowly opened his eyes and like Reed, he blinked a few times to get used to the light. He then looked at me. His brows furrowed then they eased out again.

â€œHow long have I been out?â€

â€œA day. A day and a half at the most Sir,â€ I informed him, smiling a little. but not much.

â€œIs that all?â€

â€œYes Sirâ€ Archer nodded and I saw him close his eyes again, but not for long. he opened them and looked directly at my own.

â€œThe Major told us about you and Darrenâ€

â€œI know that Sir," I looked down, knowing what was coming.

Archer closed his eyes briefly.

â€œHowâ€™s Trip and Malcolm?â€

â€œLieutenant Reed will be fine, in fact he woke before you did. Commander Tucker has yet to wake Sir,â€I said, looking up again. I wondered what I thought was coming didn't.

Archer flexed his fingers and sighed.

â€œIâ€™m sorry about Darren. He fought bravely although he did go against ordersâ€

â€œSome of his family was killed in the Xindi attack on Earth. He wanted revenge for their deaths. Heâ€¦that was all he thought about. I came to understand in the end but at first I couldnâ€™t withstand him for that. He blamed it on all the Xindiâ€

â€œAnd what did you say to that?â€ He asked gently.

â€œI told him that surely not all Xindi were to blame because basically weâ€™re the same. We had most of the same things except they most likely have something extraâ€

â€œThatâ€™s true,â€ he agreed.

Archer closed his eyes again and he didnâ€™t open them for some time. He re-opened them and smiled gently at me. It was warming and I greatly appreciated it. He knew my loss was great.

Heâ€™s gone now and he wonâ€™t be coming back.


	4. Chapter 4

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A few days had passed and Commander Tucker had awakened and got better along with Captain Archer and Lieutenant Reed. Theyâ€™d been released from Sickbay two days, providing they took things easy.

At first I didnâ€™t hear the chime go. I was too messed up with crying. Hoshi had given me some tissues she had brought with her. I appreciated that. Hoshi was always very understanding and I considered her a great friend. The chime repeated and I snapped out of what I was doing. I wiped any tears that had formed under my eyes away.

â€œCome in.â€

I turned to see Archer walk in slowly. He was dressed in casual clothing, clad in grey jogging bottoms, a blue t-shirt and blue hoodie. He looked worn out and looked like her hadnâ€™t slept in a week.

â€œI came to see when you wanted the funeral for Darren to be. I know this is a hard time for you Ensign.â€

â€œHe was always one for promptness. He always came early to whatever event he had to go to. He hated being late. I think Iâ€™d like it to be early. Itâ€™s the least I can do Sir.â€

He walked in further and laid his hand on my shoulder. I looked at him again; I couldnâ€™t hold my tears much longer. He seemed to understand and he sat on the floor with me and held me in his arms.

â€œJust let them flow. Whatâ€™s your name?â€

â€œJess,â€ I said, amidst blinking tears back.

â€œJust cry till you can cry no more, Jess.â€

I did as I was told and I cried for all kingdom come to hear. I cried into his shoulder. He didnâ€™t seem to mind. We stayed like that for an hour or more. I couldnâ€™t tell. I just couldnâ€™t hold the prospect that Darren wouldnâ€™t be there for me anymore. Heâ€™s gone. Archer held me closer and I appreciated his comfort.

â€œI think itâ€™s best if you donâ€™t work until a week after the funeral.â€

I just nodded into his shoulder. I didnâ€™t want to speak. Darren was all I could think about and I knew it would be hard letting go.

The time went and Archer pulled back but let his hands stay on my arms and shoulders.

â€œWhen would you like the funeral to be?â€

â€œAs soon as it can be done.â€

â€œHow about Monday?â€

â€œYeah.â€ I sniffed, wiping my nose with the tissue. â€œThat would be fineâ€

I saw him look at me and he wiped the tears off my face. I realised I had stopped crying.

â€œHeâ€™d want you to move on.â€

â€œYeah. I know.â€

The door chimed. This time I heard it the first time.

â€œCome in.â€ My voice seemed a little more stable now that I had cried my heart out.

Hoshi walked in carrying a box.

â€œOh. Sorry if Iâ€™m interrupting.â€

I shook my head.

â€œMajor Hayes wanted me to give you this. Iâ€™m not sure if this is a good time but he said you should have them all the same.â€

Carefully I stood. Archer also stood, wincing a little at the pain.

â€œThanks Hoshi.â€

Hoshi handed me the box and smiled.

â€œJust so you know. Weâ€™re here for you, Jess.â€

â€œIâ€™ll bear that in mind.â€ I smiled weakly, the first I had smiled in days. Maybe, with all these friends I could get through this and get by. Hoshi nodded and left the room.

Archer put his hand on my shoulder again. I didnâ€™t flinch and very much welcomed it.

â€œHoshiâ€™s right. Weâ€™ll help you through. In whatever way we can.â€

I thanked him. He told me he had to go but if I should need him at time in the evening, I should call him and he would come or I could go to him. I nodded to show I understood.

He put his hand into mind and squeezed it gently. Then he left after he cast a quick but sympathetic glance at me.

With help I can pull through.


	5. Chapter 5

Monday came all too soon and here I was. Standing in front of Darrenâ€™s coffin. I noticed every MACO including Hayes who was by my side was there along with the senior staff. I remained quiet. It was peaceful, something that was unheard of when Darren was near. This I liked. This is what I wanted for him.

Not to be dead, of course. No one wants that. But he had finally found peace again. Everyone was silent unsure of what was going to happen or who was going to shatter the silence. Captain Archer took one step forward and cleared his throat.

â€œPersonally I never knew Darren but on the planet he died on, he proved to be a brave man and will be remembered by all. I think Major Hayes can give a deeper insight to who Darren was and his character. Major.â€

Hayes nodded grimly and stepped forward as Captain Archer stepped back. He looked at me and I nodded slowly, unsure why he was turning to look at me. Sub Commander Tâ€™Pol was on my other side and she also looked at me. She gave what could be classified as an encouraging look. I nodded again in thanks.

â€œDarren, or Daz to some including myself was a good friend and loyal companion. If he hadnâ€™t noticed the Xindi coming behind the senior staff and the MACOâ€™s who went with most likely would not have lived. He enjoyed having a good time and laughing round other people. He had a great sense of humour and he also knew when he talked too much.â€

A ripple of small smiles went through the crowd, myself included.

â€œHe was my best friend and loyal companion. He was a good man and he will be greatly missed.â€

Hayes finished and slowly stepped back, his lip quavering. I knew he was deeply upset about the death of Darren. Darren was his friend. Captain Archer spoke once more and when I heard my name I knew it was my turn to give my farewell speech about Darren. I slowly stepped forward and looked at the slip of paper that I had brought along. I was never good with memory games.

â€œDarrenâ€¦was my life and my soul. I would like to recite a poem he once loved when he was a young child.â€™ The crowd nodded slightly and I started reciting it. I knew this poem from the back of my hand. I knew it well.

â€œStop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,  
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,  
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum,  
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come,  
Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead,  
Scribbling the message â€˜He is deadâ€™,  
Put crÃªpe bows around the white necks of the public doves,  
Let the traffic warden wear black cotton gloves,  
He was my north, my south, my east and west,  
My working week and my Sunday rest,  
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song,  
I thought love would last forever, I was wrong,  
The stars are not wanted now, put out every one,  
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun,  
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood  
For nothing now can ever come to any goodâ€

I paused, taking in a breath before my voice could break. I looked around at the men and women standing in respect round the coffin in which Darren lay. I continued.

â€œI hope he will live on forever in our hearts, more so in mine. He loved music and poetry, the song of the birds in the early morning. The fresh smells in the afternoon and morn. Meeting new people and making new friends. Serving under his commanding officer was a favourite past time of his and he considered everyone in the universe to be his friends before the Xindi attack happened. It damaged him and he went on his own path, despite the forewarnings and pleas given by people in the course of it all.â€™ Again I paused, taking a moment to take a deep breath. I started once more. â€˜They say a man dies twice. Once physically and once when people have forgotten him. I can say now, I wonâ€™t forget and I hope others wonâ€™t eitherâ€

There was a quiet murmur of agreement before I slowly stepped back next to Hayes and Tâ€™Pol. Hayes laid a hand on my shoulder and squeezed gently. Again Captain Archer stood forward.

â€œIs there anything else that people would like to say before we commit Darrenâ€™s body to space?â€

The crowd remained silent feeling what had to be said, was already said and done. Archer had also felt this and continued with a prayer to which everyone joined in.

â€œOur father, who art in heaven,  
Hallowed be thy name,  
Thy kingdom come, thy will be done,  
On earth as it is in heaven,  
Give us this day our daily bread,  
And forgive us our trespasses, as we,  
Forgive those who trespass against us,  
And lead us not into temptation,  
But deliver us from evil.  
For thine is the kingdom, the power and The glory, for ever and ever".

"Amen" echoed throughout the room.

A stony silence followed and Archer nodded at Lieutenant Reed who, along with Commander Tucker lifted the lid and placed it on the end of the coffin. Sealing Darren safely inside. They stepped back at the same time and Lieutenant Reed pressed a button. The coffin went into the wall and was gone. Darren was gone.

We remained in silence until one by one people, quietly filed out of the room until only Captain Archer, Sub Commander Tâ€™Pol, Commander Tucker, Lieutenant Reed, Ensign Sato, Major Hayes and myself were left behind. Captain Archer came up to me.

â€œWe need to move on nowâ€

I nodded.

â€œYes Sir. I understandâ€

Captain Archer walked out slowly followed by Ensign Sato who looked back and gave an encouraging look. Commander Tucker was the next to leave but he stopped in front of me, compassion displayed on his features. He knew what it was like, to lose someone dear to your heart, he had lost his sister.

â€œIâ€™m Sorry, Ensign. He saved our lives but lost hisâ€ He gently told me, offering a small smile.

â€œHow many Xindi did he kill Sir?â€ I had to ask him this, it would plague me forever

â€œ12â€ Came the quiet reply.

â€œHe would have been pleased.â€ I smiled weakly.

â€œIâ€™m not sure if I followâ€ Confusion was on the man's face, so I explained.

â€œThe Xindi attack killed some of his relatives who were very dear to him. His aunt Cheryl was the main of his life. He was an orphan and she brought him up. She was living in Florida at the time of the attack Sir. All Darren could think about was the want of revenge for their deaths, not just the other 6 million souls lost Sirâ€

The Commander didnâ€™t say anything but only gave an understanding nod. I knew what he was going through. He sighed and looked at me.

â€œHe was a good kid. Along with you, I wonâ€™t forget him for what he didâ€

And with a nod from me, he nodded and left quietly. Tâ€™Pol nodded and I nodded in return, she then left.

I wasnâ€™t sure why the Major and the Lieutenant stayed behind but the Lieutenant spoke.

â€œIf thereâ€™s anything you would to talk about donâ€™t forget Iâ€™m there for you. As Iâ€™m sure we all are on board.â€

â€œThank you Sir. Iâ€™ll keep that in mindâ€

He nodded and left. I looked at the place where the coffin last stood. The last good bye, I though to myself. Major Hayes glanced at where I was staring as well.

â€œWould you like me to walk you back to your quarters?â€ He kindly offered, showing me his arm.

â€œThank you Major, Iâ€™d like thatâ€ I smiled slightly.

With a last look behind us, we exited the room, my arm in his.

â€œYou were very good friends with Darren werenâ€™t you?â€ I asked, looking at Hayes' face. There was a distant look in them.

â€œYeah. I miss him just as much as you do Jess. That poem was very sadening. I nearly cried.â€ Hayes replied, blinking to hold back his tears. I squeezed his arm slightly, in comfort.

â€œYeah. Every time he asked me to read to him he would cry in earnest. I never understood why thoughâ€ I wondered out loud.

â€œHe never told anyone about his past life. Before he became an orphan. His parents were shot and he had no family left. His father left in his will that he wanted that poem read at his funeral. Darren very nearly didnâ€™t let the guy read it. But of course, he didnâ€™t have anything to say in the matter. It was in the Will and therefore had to be done by Law. He was adopted by Cheryl Applegate. He always called her Aunt Cheryl. I suppose that was his way of confronting the death of his parents. Any family the Cheryl had, he would have referred them as uncles and aunties.â€

Hayes ran his free hand over his face and we realised we had missed my quarters entirely because we were talking so much. We doubled back and entered my quarters. My bunkmate bunked elsewhere because she wanted me to have room for myself. She would be moving back in a weekâ€™s time.

We sat on the bed and didnâ€™t talk for a long time. We just looked at the window. Its black abyss lit up with millions of lanterns shining the way through.

This is how my story ends. My loss of Darren Fin was deep. Major Hayes and I eventually pulled through our loss and moved on. We eventually fell in love. At first I was afraid but knew it was meant. This time, only Archer, Tucker, Tâ€™Pol, Hoshi and Reed knew of our love. And again were happy for us.

Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.


End file.
